This is where my childhood trauma comes back to haunt me: 



I would rather have the mice back!!

(I can’t even imagine being near one long enough to take a photograph. Thanks, Google imagine search, for contributing to my nightmares after I disposed of the real thing.)

I have not had much of a life lately. My days have consisted largely of working, sitting in buses and the subway for three hours a day, and spending way too much money on food because my brain is too sapped to think about actually cooking meals  and ordering is honestly healthier when I get that way (more than once, dinner has consisted of kimchee straight from the jar and pretzels with peanut butter).

Every weekend, I try to do at least one thing that gets me out of the apartment and into a social situation. Over the course of June, that largely meant watching World Cup games (did the Women’s National Team play the long con or what?! They really had me worried!) and the occasional board game day with old friends. July so far has been a social-in-the-sun month, with a party in the Boston Public Garden and volunteering at the WGBH Ice Cream FunFest.

I’ve also tried to spend some time each weekend doing something crafty. So far, I have three jars with little silver dinosaurs on their lids, another several feet of yarn wound around the drop spindle, planted a mini pollinator garden in a deck planter out on the sidewalk, and have frogged three rows of blanket and knit back up four. 
The crafting and social things have done a world of good for me, meaning I feel an awful lot less like a zombie each Monday morning when I head back to the bus to spend my commute deafening myself in an effort to listen to podcasts over shrieking metal subway noises. 

What has not made me feel super awesome is the fact that I watched Breakfast at Tiffany’s and lost all of the cultural mystique that I had built up in my mind about a movie that is widely proclaimed as a classic.

Let me tell you something about Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Everyone – EVERYONE – in that movie is a complete ratfink. The only characters I have any good feelings about are the Tiffany’s salesman and the poor cat! 

  • Holly Golightly is the selfish manic pixie dream girl, self-absorbed and willfully ignorant, self-serving and usurious. When her own actions have her world falling down around her ears, she throws the cat – for whom she has been his only friend and home – out into the rain, yelling abuse at him.
  • The men Holly goes on dates with are drunkards, abusers, entitled, certain they have “rights” to her body.  
  • Paul is whoring himself to a married woman, living off her husband’s money and claiming Holly “belongs to [him].” 
  • Doc, Holly’s ex-husband, took a naive child bride and refuses to recognize their divorce, leaping to emotional blackmail to try to control her. 
  • 2-E, the married woman, flaunts her affair and makes every situation about herself, determined to own Paul as a plaything.
  • José wants only a pretty bride, not an invested relationship. He’s a coward and flees any sign of trouble, thinking only of his reputation and never of the feelings of another human being.
  • O.J. is a drunk whose primary occupation is insulting and exposing people to their mutual acquaintances.
  • Mr. Yunioshi is a raging, screaming, hermit who only emerges from his cave to yell at other people for existing.

I hadn’t known Mickey Rooney was even in the cast and I wanted to be delighted by his presence but his portrayal (and, largely, the scripting) of Mr. Yunioshi was made the role a racist cartoon. 
That’s two hours of my life I will never get back. It’s been a week and I’m still angry at everyone other than the poor cat and the man at Tiffany’s who is willing to them engrave a junk ring from a CrackerJack box. 

Today has been iffy but I have successfully staved off a sinus migraine. Huzzah! Also, while I didn’t actually use any of the items I have purchased over the past few weeks to encourage myself to make my own freaking food, I did make a couple of meals today! With nutritional value, even!! A chowder-inspired fish soup and buckwheat noodles with mixed vegetables in Parmesan-laden tomato sauce. Frankly, that was more productivity than I expected to get out of myself over the course of the day. My original plans involved a lot more flopping around in bed with a pillow over my eyes.

I have one final thought for the day, and that is: I should have listened to my uncle all those years ago when he told me that Dungeons & Dragons was something he thought I might enjoy. I am now currently following three D&D campaigns being podcasted (Acquisitions Inc is slow to come out so I got into The Adventure Zone and Total Party Kill), one full of professional voice actors (amazing!) being videocasted for charity (Critical Role), and Wil Wheaton’s non-D&D Titansgrave (both Titansgrave and Critical Role are shows on Geek&Sundry).

Okay, one final final thought: my adolescent ambitions were correct – I should have been a bard.


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